In my, ‘What is Your coping Strategy,’ post, I promised to assist you to figure out what your avoidance strategies may be. We all have them. Though sometimes we do not realise that it is an avoidance strategy. We label it a habit, a thing that we like to do, something we find enjoyment in.
Though in reality it is our way of quietening the Unconscious Mind Loss Loop.
To justify our beyond loss tactics we can create the Avoidance Loop. This is where we are constantly saying and thinking things like:
This stops us from discovering the source of our feelings or completing the relationship affected by our loss.
In order to move from Avoidance to Active, our first step is to become aware of our avoidance behaviours.
Whilst most of the eight listed below are not harmful in and of themselves, they become harmful when you engage in them for the wrong reasons.
- Food, Alcohol, or Drugs
- Fantasy (movies, TV, books)
- Shopping (humorously called retail therapy)
By now you have probably realised that much of what we are doing in life, we do unconsciously.
Though the beautiful thing is that once we are aware of this, we can consciously look at the things we are doing and decide what we would like to keep doing, what we’d like to start doing and what we would like to discard, forever.
This is where we get into ACTION and activate the Active loop into our world.
It is time for us to get Responsible for the way that we are living and loving our life.
We do this through asking a better set of questions.
Ones that will assist us to move beyond all of our life’s loss events and design our better every day future. I’ll deep dive into that another time.
Until next time, stay well and remember to reach out if you have any questions.
With love and gratitude,