On the 18th of October 2022, I was honoured to be one of the six chosen speakers at The Stories that Stir event in Sydney.
The theme was “Choices”
I choose to share a part of me; a raw and personal story that for over 35 years I rarely shared with anyone.
Though as we are a sum of all of our past experiences, it was important for me to share this experience.
For people to know, the complete me.
It’s titled “Always on My Mind” –
An unplanned pregnancy can be stressful, complex and a difficult situation at any age.
Though what if it’s 1973 and you are a teenager, too young to understand that no matter
what choice you decide upon, you truly are at the cross-roads to your future life.
The adoption narrative has focused on what has been gained, with little recognition for what has been lost…
Adoption begins with loss, suffered by both the birth mother and her child.
Unfortunately, it took both my daughter and me a long time for us to recognise that.
Mainly, because we were both so into believing the Happy Ever After Adoption narrative
For over 17 years it was hard for us to truly come together………….
Our relationship was TOXIC, mainly because we were too busy justifying our choices.
This STOPPED us from taking that Life Changing 12 inch journey……….
From Our HEAD to Our HEART.
Though as I had always wished she had been in my life,
I knew I had to be the one, who first took that Life Changing 12 inch journey.
To heal me. To forgive me. To love me.
To honour and respect, my misinformed, coerced 16-year-old self.
Thankfully now, after being reunited for over 21 years,
we have a HEART based relationship ~ one where we listen, love and seek to understand each other.
It has not been easy.
To be honest it’s been bloody hard,
I guess that is what happens when you’re blood-related!
Though the 48 year reunion journey, has thankfully, brought us to a place, where we should have always been.
One where I had hoped we could be.
I hope that you will take a 15 minute break, grab a cuppa and listen to my foundational life changing experience.
As a beyond loss expert, I feel it’s important that people Understand the complete adoption picture, not just the “happy ever after” perspective.
As recognising that loss, trauma, grief and suffering, have been experienced, then the healing can begin.
I look forward to reading your comments below.
Click on the picture above to watch me sharing “Always on My Mind”
or to listen to the podcast visit: